Monday.

...........I got to work quite early and quickly I returned Claude's call.   He wanted to notify me of his friends trip which should have cancelled our date, but truth be told ,I had totally forgotten about it. So the new arrangement is to meet at Claudes joint after work today .

I then faced my work for the day. I had gone  a long way in clearing the workload on my table by lunch time, so I decided to head out for a little snack. Unfortunately for me I ran  into Biola, the first thing I noticed was the foundation on her face,it was about an inch thick, the entire makeup seemed to have set into a ferocious mask. She had this green shimmery eye shadow which made me think of the Green Lantern character in the comics that I used to read in primary school. Even her green shirt was a shade too bright,anyway sha, wetin concern me.

After pleasantries were exchanged I asked about her boyfriend out of courtesy and almost bit my tongue in regret as she promptly delved into the jist of their night together. I almost gagged on my potato chips when she got to the part about their lovemaking ( believe me,I did not want to hear it). She went ahead to tell me how he pumped into her for an hour non stop. Na wa o. No change of style,no foreplay,nothing but ferocious pumping the missionary way........yawn! Am bored already.

 According to her; the guy is a stud who does it like a steam engine, according to me he is a prick who lacks style in the sexual department,mscheeew!


........anyway I endured the rest of my lunch and went back to my office.

Sunday


................ I woke up feeling so grouchy,didn't sleep well. It seemed that there was lots of comings and goings within my compound or was I just dreaming?     I made coffee and took a scalding sip, Yeepa! My tongue.  Am about to settle down to a nice breakfast of toast and eggs when I hear someone whimpering by my window. Hunger no gree me check wetin dey, so I ignored the sound and had my meal. While heading to church I saw one of my neighbors children crouched by the gate with her eyes as red as hot coals. "Stella,what is the problem" I asked. When I heard her reply I wished I hadn't asked her in the first place.

 Her father haven heard of his wife's condition from the other neighbors who had rush her to the hospital presumably decided to console himself with more local gin,he therefore drank himself to stupor and fell into the gutter beside the house,so late at night he limped in smelling of alcohol and every other vile thing you can think of. His children who hadn't eaten all day of course went to bed hungry.
I told Stella to check me after church so I could give her whatever I could spare in terms of food. I felt truly sorry for the girl.

.........Church was fun today ,we had a visiting pastor from another branch, his sermon was quite interesting as he laced it with his local language which am sure no one understood,he also had a song for every point he made whether relevant or not.
In the evening Stella came over and I gave her some rice ,sardine,a bunch of plantain and some money.

.........Saw a couple of missed calls from Claude, will call him tomorrow abeg. I wan sleep .  

.........  weekend at last . Biola was the first to call me and I purposely did not pick up because I wasn’t in the mood to speak to her.

.........My neighbour's are at it again, they no dey tire to fight. I wonder what the problem is this time, the last time it was the husband who got drunk and presumed his wife was a punching bag, mind you she is presently carrying their fifth child and they live in the boysquaters. So this morning they start their usual yelling and curses began to rain in full torrent.

..........While eating a breakfast of oat meal, I heard shrill screams and I just had to take a sneak peak , I saw the gateman running towards the back quarters  and I called him to ask questions; but what did I hear , lo and behold the pregnant woman had fainted after being punched into a pulp. I was so shocked.

...........My phone rang and some crazy guy was on the line telling me that he got my number from Claude (my restaurant owner friend). Mhhh and all he had to say was that he wanted me to do some PR stuff for him, so I scheduled lunch for Sunday so that I could get a proper perspective on what he wanted. Then soon as he cut the line I called Claude for the lowdown, I was assured that the guy was into legitimate business and he wanted to go into politics so basically he wanted someone who could launder his image and provide some sort of acceptable social gallery to fit his profile.

...........Later in the evening I overheard my neighbors’ whispering about the fight that occurred in the morning, the woman had a miscarriage and is still in the hospital.

I slept like a baby.

.........Thank God ,the week is almost over ,I  can’t wait for the weekend. Adia didn’t show up for our date, she had to go to Abuja on an errand, so we are seeing later today. Mmmmmmh, jist go boku.

My oga dey vex today say the office work schedule dey favour me, shuo; na my fault?   I was just lucky that I didn’t have to come to work tomorrow, with the way he is going about it he may try to change it but I trust myself at the clock of closing time I would bolt right out of the office and zoom off.

...........4pm: I was sneaking out of the office when I heard my oga screaming my name, quickly I got into the car and started the ignition, before I could move the car one of my colleagues ran to me shouting that oga wanted me to wait… for where I do like say I no hear na so I wind up, face front, zoom of sharp, sharp.

I headed to Saipan, for dinner with Adia. She came in looking fabulous in a white ensemble, we ordered drinks and jisted the night away it’s really good hanging out with my dear old friend again, thank God she is back in Lagos for good.

Got home 9.30 pm and crawled straight into bed.

Tuesday.

Work up late, soooo late.  I dashed into the bathroom and am sure that I wasn’t clean after my bath because I really rushed it, then voom I rushed into the car and speed down to the office.
Lucky me; I got to work early. I then finished my assignment and felt so good about it that I mentally gave myself a pat on the back because I know that I did a splendid job even if I say so, myself.

………I purposely avoided Biola today during lunch, I knew she would be at the neighbourhood café because I saw staff from her office around the corner when I stepped out.  I really didn’t want to listen to her whining today or any day for that matter.

………When she tells me that her boyfriend is irresponsible and I agree, she immediately becomes angry at me saying that I don’t like him because he is short thereby making me prejudiced and she goes on to tell me how much she loves him bla,bla,bla…in fact the matter tire me sef.

Come to think of it; the guy is truly short and he looks like a refined monkey, seriously you need to see him in suit…mmh, okoro feeling funky. The last time I saw the dude he was actually wearing a hideous looking purple suit with pointed Aladin shoes that looked too big for his feet. I also though I caught a glimpse of yellow streaks in his teeth. Abeg make I leave that matter for now jor I need to go for break and there is still work to be done.

THIS IS TAM'S DIARY

Monday. 


   Mmmmmh ! back to work again, I wish the weekend could go on forever. Though it was hectic I had fun both with the dinner organized by the embassy and meeting Adia again after so many years, she really has changed. So tey she don yellow pass before.

......It was really a pleasant surprise to see her, am hoping that I would see more of her as she promised since she will be moving back to Lagos this month. I sure need a change from my other crazy friends. Friends like Biola who is now a pain in the …...On account of her constant whinning about her yeye boyfriend.

 Lord have mercy! Must there be traffic in lagos all the time, I really mustn’t be late today because I have to put finishing touches to my assignment and submit to my oga. Even though he is accommodating I really shouldn’t take him for granted.

…… Hectic day. Adia called me and we jisted for so long. We will have dinner on Wednesday then she will download Abuja jist for me.

So tired I need a warm bath badly. I guess the excitement of last night’s party hasn’t worn off.